May 5th, 2007


Lizbeth Rewatches Battlestar Galactica — 1978: Lost Planet of the Gods, Part 1

This is continued from Part 1 of Lizbeth Rewatches Battlestar Galactica 1978: 'Lost Planet of the Gods, Part 1,' subtitled (by me), Sweet Mother of Jesus, Stop Calling Them "Girls."

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Rumor has it that the Lost Planet of the Gods episodes were actually three scripts that were cobbled together in a bit of a rush. Certainly the Baltar scenes look like they came from different episodes and the disease-of-the-week angle definitely looks tacked on.

Despite the rampant sexism in this part (most notably, rampant sexism from Starbuck) on the whole the episode isn't actually that bad. Okay, okay. I snark because I love. It's better than the Planet of the Bug People that ate the second half of 'Saga,' and we're getting into the mytharc pretty quickly.

So, it's time to keep score, peoples. In 'Lost Planet of the Gods, Part 1' we see:
  • More Apollo-Starbuck subtext than you can shake a stick at. I'm beginning to think that the slashers rooted those stories in canon.  Yes. It was that blatant.
  • Conclusive evidence that Serena is a Humolon
  • Ample reason to put Starbuck down like the sexist, rabid dog he is
  • Proof that Apollo is awesome, his little issues with his future wife-y-poo wearing a pilot's uniform aside
  • That "lieutenant" isn't so much a rank, but a nice title that is handed out like candy to anyone who climbs into a cockpit
  • The beginnings of  the "let's ignore Athena and maybe she'll go away" tactics from the writers
  • Ed Begley Jr. kicking acting ass in this 5.5 seconds of screentime
  • Boomer showing all the commonsense and brains of a turnip
  • Tigh wondering if it's too late to transfer to another ship in the fleet before Adama gives him a heart-attack
  • The desperate need to up Adama's meds. I hear from Laura that chamalla is the way to go here
  • That sisters damn well can do it for themselves. In fact, they can do it so well, that maybe they could've saved the Colonies from being wiped out if they were allowed to be viper pilots, lack of training be damned.
  • That the Cylons are, if possible, devolving to a lower life form, complete with lower intelligence
  • The only person crazier than Adama is Baltar. Maybe.

And, so, class, what is our moral lesson from 'Lost Planet of the Gods, Part 1?'

Don't ever, ever, ever call a woman in uniform "girl" if she's armed, and knows how to fly an viper up your ass.

I give 'Lost Planet of the Gods, Part 1' a big Four Minutes of the bloodbath that would follow when 1978 Starbuck makes the fatally tragic mistake of calling 2003 Starbuck "a girl."